silence
entwined with birth and death
a companion
of that eternal second
when the
ears hurt in anticipation what follows next
a human
voice trapped beneath the veil
I gaze at
the sky and listen
if clouds
will rain down the words
you may
have told me once
somewhere
between making lunch and cleaning the house
as my
curious hands searched for gold I lost in the sandpit
I remember
your smile shinning above me
as my
fingertips spilled red colour over whatever they touched
I was
hungry for your wisdom and mysteries you held
my youth
kept me from understanding and remembering
we were
spending time with animals and fields
your body
already carrying a fatal secret
I slept in
your bed when death came
and explained
the significance of its existence
yet as we
parted it said I could still save you
needless to
say I didn't succeed
as we found
you without a spark in the same bed few days later
the
graveyard added another name to its list
among
faceless names, this one I knew
as someone
who saw who I shall become
years later
your gravestone still sparks a smile on my face
and I
wonder if we could see each other now
how much
we'd have to say, what advice you'd give
but life is
full of those eternal seconds
in which we
search for a human voice
*
Needless to say this is very personal and I may change my mind and delete this post... I was listening to Pink Floyd and this memory came to mind. I was a child of five, very shy and insecure, but she gave me something, my voice.
This reminds me of the story of Henry Mancini, who wrote the song for The Pink Panther. Let me know if you'd like the youtube link.
ReplyDeleteyes, please, send me the link.
Deletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg_au070cpo
ReplyDeletebeautiful.
Delete"I was hungry for your wisdom and mysteries you held" the yearning that remains throughout is poignant ....
ReplyDeletesuch deep seated thoughts
ReplyDeleteThis is what life is all about the close relationship with others and the grief and responsibility we carry after they have gone. Love is beautiful but sad too.
ReplyDeleteIt's as if when those close to us die, they leave a piece of themselves for us to keep living... I always feel that... I loved this poem and how she gave you your voice.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very thoughtful and deeply moving poem, Natasa. Yes, life is full of those eternal seconds and memories of what once was.
ReplyDeletedeeply moving indeed.we all yearn, in our own ways, for certain wonderful moments which we can never recover.
ReplyDeletei am glad you did not delete it before i read it...i had a brush with death yesterday....some people i barely remember from a time long ago...so my thoughts are similar in figuring those feelings out a bit....
ReplyDeleteWhat a blessing--the memory, the time, the opportunity--but how can a young one know that at the time of abandonment? This poem is a gift for me and for many. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThis is a fantastic poem, which must be read by many. Thank you for sharing it. It speaks to our human condition, life and death, especially of those significant ones in our lives........this is one of your best, Natasa. You went deep.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for not deleting this. It is beautiful and like most beautiful poetry it is personal and straight from your heart. It's actually nice to have such a warm memory.
ReplyDeleteYou shared a very moving poem, Nataša. It is very personal but has some childhood undertones many of us can relate to. 'yet as we parted it said I could still save you' - children believe this, don't they?
ReplyDeleteThis is a very sad and moving post ~ I specially like: if clouds will rain down the words, and your body carrying a fatal spirit ~ Thanks for sharing this ~
ReplyDeleteGrace
The persons that are part of our pasts .. no longer being able to talk to them... I'm especially moved by the last four lines of your poem.. they seem to speak of that universal loss of having to continue alone.
ReplyDeleteoh wow...what a deeply personal and emotional piece... glad you shared it with us
ReplyDeleteSuch a deep and loving sense in this piece--Thank you for sharing this memory with us--so very precious --the time we have with each other
ReplyDeleteNatasa, did you notice that Geoff cited your poem as inspiration for his, over at his blog? Nice !
ReplyDeleteA death or a birth sometimes gives us voice...very profound ...
ReplyDelete..and yes, only Pink Floyd can initiate such deep, poetic thoughts... I agree... :-)
Great poem, thank you so much for sharing your memories.
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful Natasa… it makes me remember sitting on my grandmother's bed as a child, listening to her stories. She lived with us until she died. Years later as a young adult that bed became mine when I had back problems and it was the firmest bed in our house. She taught me so much. Thank you for helping me to relive some loving memories.
ReplyDeleteHaunting and beautiful.
ReplyDeletewhere to start...indeed very personal these deep emotions...beautiful stil....the phrase,
ReplyDelete"and I wonder if we could see each other now
how much we'd have to say, what advice you'd give"
says so much about the longing...I can see how it inspired and touched so many!
This is beautiful and touched me in ways it would be difficult to explain. Thank you,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
PS Pink Floyd is a favorite of mine as well.
It was courageous of you to share something so personal and I'm glad you did. There is a lot of meaning in this, both to you personally (obviously) and to anyone who has lost a long-time loved one. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing, Natasha. Our life is all these moments, our ground/base from where we take unique flight...you touch heart strings of many....
ReplyDeletethis is such a touching piece....bittersweet and beautiful. and the title matches perfectly!
ReplyDeleteDeath and the desire to see the loved ones alive today is nicely expressed.'
ReplyDelete