Tuesday, 2 July 2013

Poem: When you hear yourself think

if I spent spring sitting at the river’s edge
expecting nothing, I was probably just waiting
for the sun to ignite my skin -----
                I still ponder there, like the last raven
in the autumn dusk, not quite feeling at home
but close enough to that everlasting light
to stay awhile longer, breathing the sky
knowing you could be more
than this skeleton you've become
                quenching your thirst
                               forging your words
flying your dreams on a kite
only to be shot down
dragging assumptions on the floor
when they should be lighter than air
if there was a washer of our minds
up where the clouds are born
he'd grew weary a long time ago
and quit his job
when you hear yourself think
do you go deaf?



  1. sitting in the sun thinking - what could be better. Lovely poem

  2. This poem is a story, it's a song... I all the words.... breathtaking

  3. A nostalgic but beautiful poem, filled with very evocative imagery. I like "but close enough to that everlasting light / to stay awhile longer, breathing the sky". And you are right assumptions should be lighter than air.

  4. ...that hanging question at the end is like a scary thought to think about... yet, true to some intances in life... smiles...

  5. A thought provoking piece with questions left to answer

  6. I enjoyed the way you pondered important things in this poem. I think sitting at the river's edge would be the perfect setting to ponder. Some beautifully worded lines. I like the idea of flying dreams on a kite but am saddened they are shot down. Your question at the end provokes thought, Natasa.

  7. Prompts one to look deeper in life.

  8. an excellent and profound question, Natasa ~ M

  9. Breathtaking if you ask me. Amazing thoughts. The ending just caught me unguarded and hit my mind wit everything you wanted to say out of this poem. Keep it going. :)

  10. 'flying your dreams on a kite'
    that is very good. I like this one.

  11. oh, very cool close on the question natasa....
    it is interesting how some places just feel right in certain seasons
    and so uncomfortable in others---the last raven of the season
    is a cool line as well...

  12. I enjoyed the reflections on the seasons ~ Maybe I like to think out aloud & sort my thoughts first before writing them down ~ Thanks for sharing ~

  13. This is brilliant, especially the latter half of the poem.

    "knowing you could be more
    than this skeleton you've become"

    "dragging assumptions on the floor
    when they should be lighter than air" - These lines are superb.

    And yes, if there was one as such to sift through our thoughts, in due time, (s)he will surely go weary. When I hear myself think, sometimes, I end up wishing that I was deaf. :P

  14. excellent.. being one that enjoys the solitude especially in nature... this really appealed...

    in Nature this really

  15. knowing you could be more
    than this skeleton you've become...

    Your words are beautiful, so melancholy, but this is a mood many can relate to.

  16. I LOVE "I still ponder there like the last raven"........there is a lot to think about in this poem. Loved it!

  17. Oh, yes, there are places we need to visit to have those moments when we matter the season. This was gorgeous!

  18. I loved the introspective part of this--I am in this place so often in my little world---your piece resonates

  19. a wonderful argument ... Shhhhhhhhh

  20. I love the contemplative tone throughout coupled with some provocative questioning. Excellent and thoughtful write!

  21. breathtaking!
    i liked the way you linked all these lovely imagery together.

  22. the questions are framed beautifully
    and then you end it with a twang in the brain
    very well constructed